These miss you nights
by Star-07
Summary: John fic


It's a John fic, but not a nasty or lets all feel sorry for him one, just a idea of how he fell in love with the stars as he seems to love them as much as me.  
The story is mixed with song lyrics (in bold) that help me think of the story, after each passage is the lyrics that go with it.  
These miss you nights  
  
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Signing in..  
  
Password correct.  
  
Entering journal.  
  
Well its Thursday and so that means I'm off home soon, but I love being up here I am on the edge of a vast expanse of space I feel like I am some sort of protector of this planet sometimes, well I suppose I am sort off. If danger has occurred then this is the place where I answer peoples desperate cries for help. I suppose there is the other side though the side I try and forget, the idea that I am alone, very much alone on a cold satellite with only the stars, and my thoughts. I can think for hours up here without either having Virgil practise his scales in the background or being interrupted by Gordon shouting at the TV, it's quiet, still, alone. One thought of her I'm not longer alone, I remember all the times at school when we were young and the times we would watch the stars together when we were teenagers, god I miss her.   
I've had many times I can tell you  
  
Times when innocence I'd trade for company  
  
  
  
It's true what they say, children can be cruel and I felt it first hand, and why because I was lean, blond, very intelligent and most of all, different. It hurt every horrible comment every giggle from my classmates all about me, I cried about it got angry about it but still I had no friends in my class, until she came along. She started in my class at school when I was 8 years old and as soon as a saw her I knew there was something about her, something special, and I was right. I don't understand how we met I was so shy so alone, so I shocked myself by talking to her one day in the library she was looking at a star chart and I suppose it went from there. She was my friend for years we grew up together, she understood me, she stood up for me, and most of all she showed me something that I have never thanked her for, the stars.   
  
  
  
And children saw me crying  
  
I thought I'd had my share of that  
  
But these miss you nights are the longest  
  
  
  
Dad was an astronaut and I was told tails of space but I never really understood the beauty and desire they gave out until she showed me. We would sit for hours as dusk set in and stole the light from above our huge old tree in the open fields near my house, and as the radiance diminished sparkling diamonds began to infiltrate the sky. Lying on our backs in the fields staring in to the vast eternity of space, with only each other that's all we wanted it was heaven. I'd look downwards sometimes and watch the stars reflecting into her eyes as a breeze of overwhelming happiness and love swarmed my emotions, but at that time I only thought it was for the stars I loved. Every evening we would spend together looking up, she showed me how the stars could be a map and so I would never lose my way, and how I would never be alone anymore.   
  
  
  
Midnight diamonds stud my heaven  
  
Southward burning like the jewels that eyed your face  
  
And the warm winds that embrace me  
  
Just as surely as I'd kissed your face  
  
Yet those miss you nights they're the longest  
  
  
  
  
  
She was beautiful; her thick dark lashes surrounded her deep brown eyes that seemed to draw me in to her, as long dark curls shaped her face and a heart melting smile spread across her crimson lips, I remember that I couldn't take my eyes off her and I can't get her out of my memory now. I was 18 when I had finally found the right words to tell her my feelings for her and I had left it too late, we had to go our separate ways for studying, I began NASA training soon and was leaving her behind. Our dream was coming true, the dream we both had invented when we were 9, we were both going to go into space together, we were going to explore and discover new stars and reach out and touch them, together.  
No I was going one-way and she another no longer would there be the stargazing together, but I would be back we would come back together, we promised but not for a while. It was hard, very hard to be away from a friend, a person who I trusted, laughed with, cried with, a girl, no a beautiful woman who I loved for 10 years without knowing, or at least not excepting that I did. We both wouldn't let the time we had spent together be wasted we weren't giving up on each other we would be together again when I had finished training, I couldn't wait for time to pass, we were going to be together.   
  
  
  
  
  
Lay down all thoughts of your surrender  
  
It's only me who's killing time  
  
  
  
I had missed her until my heart hurt while we were away from each other, we phoned each other sent letters, and I sent pictures of space shuttles and satellites we were studying at NASA, while she sent me images of distant constellations from the observatory where she was working. We would even play games with each other one how long it was until we next met up and when we would start our own adventure. But at 21 things had changed, we hadn't, our feeling, hopes, dreams hadn't but something had, I had a different path to follow one I had to do, one without her.   
  
  
  
Play down all dreams once remembered  
  
It's just the same this miss you game  
  
  
  
She didn't understand, how could she I wasn't honest with her and I couldn't be, I had to end our dreams and our plans I was leaving but this time I wouldn't be back, International Rescue was my destiny decided for me, but one right then that was so painful as it would cost me so much to leave her behind. She ran away from me, I didn't blame her, I couldn't all I could say was sorry and I loved her and every time I saw a star I would see her and think of her every day, but I had to go. That was it we left for Tracy Island, for a new life to become the most famous rescue organisation in the world, but I was still hurting.  
  
  
  
Thinking of my going  
  
How to cut the thread and leave it all behind  
  
  
  
What could I do? Nothing, each day I would look up at dusk remembering her telling me how I would never be lost the stars were my guide, each day break I would think of her but force myself to do my work, but the nights were different, I missed her. I would sit on the edge of the beach and watch the stars emerge from the fading crimson and burnt orange mix, and dream of her, as I always do now and forever will.  
  
  
  
Looking windward for my compass  
  
I take each day as it arrives  
  
But these miss you nights are the longest  
  
  
  
That's were I am now I suppose, every other month I get to look down on Earth, on her and pray she is looking up as that's a way we will always stay in each others hearts, but every night with the stars encompassing me in TB5 I dream of her being with me as.  
  
  
  
  
  
.These miss you nights are the longest.  
  
  
  
I don't own Thunderbirds or the song used in this story, but it is one of my favourites.  
  
  
Oh and thank you for who ever did the first song/story it REALLY helped me write this so hope you don't mind me using the idea. R+R please thanks Star*  
  
  
  
Song by Westlife - Miss you nights  
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